How are you today?

Such a simple question but this past month it has been a loaded question for me. Even updating my blog has me a little on edge. Sharing this is completely out of my comfort zone. But one thing I have learned this month is that there are some things that are bigger than one person. Many of you know that I've been dealing with positional vertigo for the past 3 years. After my CT scan and MRI this past month, we think we know what the problem is.  I've been diagnosed with Superior Semicircular Canal Dehiscence. Basically there is a hole in an ear bone.  Who knew that such a small bone could cause so much grief. I think I was handling it okay until I found out that the only way to fix it is by doing a craniotomy. I've been full of gratitude for the strong people around me willing to take big responsibilities off my shoulders and allow me to dissolve into a mess and then pick up the pieces.  Am I grateful for trials? No. I'm still a little angry and I say "why me". Then I feel guilty because I know there are so many worse things out there.  Will I get through this? Yes. But not alone and my hair may not be as pretty. Will it be easy? Most likely not. This has been the hardest thing for me yet. Emotionally, I'm falling apart. I have good days and bad days and I'm so grateful for the good days.  So next time you ask, "How are you today?" realize that it is a loaded question that might be followed with a loaded answer.  :)